How Not To Be Desperate Leading Up To Valentines Day.
It’s getting close to that time of year when every sad, single person works their way through a whole box of tissues, spends all day crying tears of loneliness and wonders whether they’ll always be destined for the life of Miss Havisham. Myself included. (Minus the tears. I’ve toughened up over the years.)
Why are we the lonely ones? Why are all of our friends in the best relationships, having plenty of sex and planning their lives together? Heck, some of them are even engaged, getting married and having children. Yet we’re sat alone, we sleep alone and we have no one to say ‘I love you’ to.
Do you have the friends who use the age old ‘you’ll find someone’ lines on you? The ‘you’ll find someone when you least expect it’ or ‘you don’t need to worry about it yet’? I do and I hate it. I don’t want to have to be patient and wait for, potentially, years until I just happen to find someone when I least expect it. NO! I’m at my prime (supposedly) I want to spend the next years of my life having fun with a partner, falling deeply in love and having lots of sex that everyone who’s in their twenties is almost definitely having. I want someone who I can snuggle up to in bed, someone who will not run a mile when they wake up next to me in the morning, someone who supports me and my dreams, someone who loves all of my flaws. And I want to be someone else’s ‘someone’.
However it appears finding a partner is hard, disappointing and futile.
I’m not even fussy…all I want is a geeky, bookish man who has good manners, likes to cuddle and can tolerate out of tune singing and is in it for the long run. I love glasses, stubble and good smelling aftershave too but they’re totally optional. See…not fussy AT ALL. (Right?) AND age doesn’t matter (it’s just a number, right? (Although I draw the line at 35 because then we’re getting into creepy territory. Sorry, I digress.))
So where am I going wrong? (Perhaps Twitter stalking isn’t the best method for partner finding.)
I could hang out in bookshops and wait until a man who suits my ‘type’ walks in. But then what does one do? Pounce? Drop something and oh so slowly pick it up in front of them? Accidently bump into them? Snog them? I don’t think I’m very versed in chatting up techniques.
Maybe I should listen to friends; maybe I should stop actively searching and just wait until someone comes along. But how long does that take? If I stop searching now, will the perfect man get in touch tomorrow? I don’t think so.
Should I re-join Tinder and accept all casual sex requests in the hope that might lead somewhere? (No, thank you. I don’t want an STI.)
What about dating websites? They have good success rates, don’t they? But then what happens if I meet one of those people pretending to be a young man and then turns out to be 50, married and has kids. Knowing my luck, that’ll be me.
Am I starting to sound desperate? I imagine I am.
Basically I just want to fall in love, find my ‘forever’ person and never have to spend another Valentine’s Day or any other day of the year, for that matter, alone again.
So, if you can tolerate bad singing (as mentioned above), a little bit too much swearing, someone who likes to sleep, a big reader, a passionate writer, a big sap, someone who will love you totally and someone who can make a mean banoffee pie, then what are you waiting for? Get in touch. I’m ready!
Why are we the lonely ones? Why are all of our friends in the best relationships, having plenty of sex and planning their lives together? Heck, some of them are even engaged, getting married and having children. Yet we’re sat alone, we sleep alone and we have no one to say ‘I love you’ to.
Do you have the friends who use the age old ‘you’ll find someone’ lines on you? The ‘you’ll find someone when you least expect it’ or ‘you don’t need to worry about it yet’? I do and I hate it. I don’t want to have to be patient and wait for, potentially, years until I just happen to find someone when I least expect it. NO! I’m at my prime (supposedly) I want to spend the next years of my life having fun with a partner, falling deeply in love and having lots of sex that everyone who’s in their twenties is almost definitely having. I want someone who I can snuggle up to in bed, someone who will not run a mile when they wake up next to me in the morning, someone who supports me and my dreams, someone who loves all of my flaws. And I want to be someone else’s ‘someone’.
However it appears finding a partner is hard, disappointing and futile.
I’m not even fussy…all I want is a geeky, bookish man who has good manners, likes to cuddle and can tolerate out of tune singing and is in it for the long run. I love glasses, stubble and good smelling aftershave too but they’re totally optional. See…not fussy AT ALL. (Right?) AND age doesn’t matter (it’s just a number, right? (Although I draw the line at 35 because then we’re getting into creepy territory. Sorry, I digress.))
So where am I going wrong? (Perhaps Twitter stalking isn’t the best method for partner finding.)
I could hang out in bookshops and wait until a man who suits my ‘type’ walks in. But then what does one do? Pounce? Drop something and oh so slowly pick it up in front of them? Accidently bump into them? Snog them? I don’t think I’m very versed in chatting up techniques.
Maybe I should listen to friends; maybe I should stop actively searching and just wait until someone comes along. But how long does that take? If I stop searching now, will the perfect man get in touch tomorrow? I don’t think so.
Should I re-join Tinder and accept all casual sex requests in the hope that might lead somewhere? (No, thank you. I don’t want an STI.)
What about dating websites? They have good success rates, don’t they? But then what happens if I meet one of those people pretending to be a young man and then turns out to be 50, married and has kids. Knowing my luck, that’ll be me.
Am I starting to sound desperate? I imagine I am.
Basically I just want to fall in love, find my ‘forever’ person and never have to spend another Valentine’s Day or any other day of the year, for that matter, alone again.
So, if you can tolerate bad singing (as mentioned above), a little bit too much swearing, someone who likes to sleep, a big reader, a passionate writer, a big sap, someone who will love you totally and someone who can make a mean banoffee pie, then what are you waiting for? Get in touch. I’m ready!
Laura
20 years old (but I always told I'm mature for my age, apparently I'm almost like a 40 year old.)
A bit short, about 5ft5? Maybe smaller.
Not skinny, a bit curvy.
Wears glasses. (When I'm not taking selfies.)
I like: pizza, banoffe pie, books, cute dogs, cats, reading, writing, watching Sherlock, musicals, walking in the countryside, singing out loud (badly), cuddling, candles, fish (that swim, not the ones you eat. Although I do like eating tuna and mackerel) big bubble baths and spontaneous dancing.
I couldn’t live without: BOOKS, music, mini eggs and big cold glasses of water.
I don’t like: alcohol, cigarettes, drugs, having cold feet, bright lights, busy places, loud sounds, crying and sad things.
I want: a man. Who likes a lot of the same things, likes cuddles and doesn’t watch TV all the time and doesn’t have an addiction to the PS4 or Xbox. Someone who wants to read in bed in the evenings and won’t get angry if I make a mess when I cook. Someone who wants to find their ‘forever’ partner. Someone who wants to get married, have children and live happily ever after.
This is me being a big poser:
20 years old (but I always told I'm mature for my age, apparently I'm almost like a 40 year old.)
A bit short, about 5ft5? Maybe smaller.
Not skinny, a bit curvy.
Wears glasses. (When I'm not taking selfies.)
I like: pizza, banoffe pie, books, cute dogs, cats, reading, writing, watching Sherlock, musicals, walking in the countryside, singing out loud (badly), cuddling, candles, fish (that swim, not the ones you eat. Although I do like eating tuna and mackerel) big bubble baths and spontaneous dancing.
I couldn’t live without: BOOKS, music, mini eggs and big cold glasses of water.
I don’t like: alcohol, cigarettes, drugs, having cold feet, bright lights, busy places, loud sounds, crying and sad things.
I want: a man. Who likes a lot of the same things, likes cuddles and doesn’t watch TV all the time and doesn’t have an addiction to the PS4 or Xbox. Someone who wants to read in bed in the evenings and won’t get angry if I make a mess when I cook. Someone who wants to find their ‘forever’ partner. Someone who wants to get married, have children and live happily ever after.
This is me being a big poser:
My cheeks don't normally look that skinny. When I do a big smile I get fat hamster cheeks.